March 20, 2023
Self-beliefs and self-love: how to find your inner Moxie!
Many of us struggle with self-doubt and negative self-talk, which can lead to a lack of confidence and a feeling of being stuck.
However, unlocking our full potential lies within ourselves - in our self-beliefs and self-love. By cultivating a strong sense of inner Moxie, we can overcome obstacles, chase our dreams, and live a fulfilling life.
What the hell is Moxie and how does it help with self-belief, self-love and realising our potential?
Well, I have to be honest I’ve only learnt about this term recently and it certainly had me curious.
Together let’s explore what Moxie means, why self-love is essential in cultivating it, and an exercise I found to be powerful in elevating your self belief (Moxie!).
What is Moxie?
According to the dictionary, Moxie is a “force of character, determination, or nerve.” In other words, it's a woman who believes in herself and makes things happen!
Let’s take a pause for a moment, perhaps close your eyes and imagine what life would look like if you fully backed yourself. If you looked at those who inspire you and said if they can do that, then so can I.
What action would you take, what impact would you have, how would your life be different?
If you’re struggling perhaps my story (below) will help you to imagine what could be possible.
The journey to Moxie
Growing up I was endearingly referred to as chubby.
I was the middle child in an otherwise slim family of five which meant I always felt like I stood out for all the wrong reasons. I knew my place with a big brother who used to call me fatty karatty (seriously) and my mum's bestie telling her in front of me, when I was around eight, that if her daughter was chubby like me she would make her go to weight watchers.
It will come as no surprise that experiences like these shaped how I felt about myself and my body.
The words to explain this situation: ashamed, not pretty enough, not sporty enough, not good enough and the list goes on.
Whilst my body journey has been painful and if I’m honest it’s an ongoing inner battle that I continue to work on, it is at the core of who I am and has been pivotal in my becoming the person that I aspire to be.
I know I’m not alone in my conflicted relationship with my body because it’s a conversation that comes up often with coaching clients when we’re exploring what’s holding them back.
This is why I want to share with you how our greatest inner struggles can pave the way to unlocking our Moxie, our potential and what it is that lights our soul on fire.
So, as the chubby little girl grew into an adult, she would look in the mirror often feeling disappointment in her appearance which would then manifest into feelings of hopelessness and cycles of binge eating her feelings. Further propelling the mindset of not being good enough, the feelings of shame and the behaviour of eating the feelings.
In my 20s I met someone, my ex-husband Mike and ironically he was fit, healthy and hated smoking (I was a smoker).
I started thinking about settling down, what it would look like to have kids and realised that if I didn’t make a change it would impact the mother I aspired to be.
The task felt overwhelming, I realistically needed to lose over 20 kgs and I had no idea where to start.
It was at this moment I realised that I couldn’t believe in myself and my ability to make this change if I didn’t start to love who I was and all the imperfect, flawed bits that made me, me.
As a wise woman recently said to me: “Self-love is self-belief”, and when I look back my Moxie was born out of learning to love myself for who I was.
The only way to do that was to ask myself how can I love myself a little more today than I did yesterday? That’s where the shift truly began.
The first small act of self-love was to invest in a habit change course called Smokenders. They taught me how to change all the tiny habits I associated with smoking over a 12 week period. By the end of it I didn’t want a smoke. My Moxie had been ignited and I was curious to see where it took me.
The next act of self-love was to move my body. I committed to just walking 5kms a day 4 days a week around Albert Park lake. My dad was so inspired that he would drive to join me and together we would walk at 6am and immerse ourselves in deep conversations.
This is just some of my journey,check out the Hacking Happy Podcast here to hear more of my story.
What I learnt is that Moxie/Self Belief is built through struggle, through intention and through small acts of self-love. It won’t be perfect, it will feel messy and because we are humans will come with a roller coaster of emotions and that’s all ok.
So, if you’d like to be a woman who backs herself and takes action the best time to start is now.
An exercise to help embrace your Moxie
I recently came across a beautiful little tool in my Psychology studies that provides a great place to start. It’s called a Future’s Diary and it’s designed to help you make intentional quality decisions based on how you want to feel everyday. This is so critical to making change because how you feel, impacts your mindset which impacts your behaviour. Here’s how it works:
Remember the greatest act of self love is self belief.
Small acts of self-belief every day build the courage and the confidence to step into big acts of self belief over time and that my friend is where you blow this Moxie thing out of the park. It’s a long but worthy game to play.
My journey of self-love continues to evolve and today when I look in the mirror I like who I see. She’s not skinny, she’s strong, she’s sassy, she’s a healthy mother of one and she’s oozing with Moxie and ready to surprise the shit out of herself in terms of what she’s capable of in the year ahead.
If you’re ready to step into your Moxie but don’t feel you can go it alone. I’m here for you.Click here to book a FREE clarity call with me today and let’s explore how I can help.
Want to listen about what Moxie is and how to find it? Plus hear more about my story?Check out the Hacking Happy Podcast here.